I have a body full of tattoos, and I’m here for the art. Most people think it looks cool, myself included. At least, that’s how I used to see it. I always thought I looked like a badass, and at some point in my life, yeah, I kind of needed that attention. But this isn’t to say that people who get tattoos need attention—everyone has their own reasons. This post isn’t here to ridicule or mock anyone with tattoos or discourage others from getting one. Mostly, I wanted to let you know why I wish I hadn’t gotten them and why I regret it.

Tattoos are permanent, but these days, with advancements in beauty science and technology, they can be removed with laser treatments. Still, the way I see it, they’re always there, spiritually speaking. And let’s not forget, the removal process is even more painful than getting them in the first place. My first tattoo was my grandma’s name—so I could see her name and remember her forever. But, you know what they say: once you get one, you can’t stop. I was that type, so I ended up with little “sticker” tattoos all over my arms and big ones until my body was nearly covered. There were moments, of course, when I felt proud of it all. I got attention. It looked cool, and seeing the amazement in people’s eyes, knowing how painful it was, gave me satisfaction. I looked strong and fierce.

I’m still okay with my tattoos, but as I’ve aged and my mindset has evolved, I kind of regret them now. Not because they’re ugly or anything, but because of the intentions behind them. As I continue exploring and discovering myself, I’ve learned to love myself more deeply. With that came a realization: if I had truly loved myself back then, I might have treated my body and my skin with more respect. There was a time when I didn’t really love myself, and I wanted to hurt myself in that form. But somehow, the artist in me still wanted to see beauty in the pain. So, these tattoos on my body represent all the love and hate I had for myself. Beauty is pain, and so is change.

Even though I regret them, I don’t plan on having them removed because they’re part of my journey toward acceptance. Living with them is my acceptance, but acceptance isn’t just letting things be; it’s continuing forward with compassion and perseverance, hoping for the best. Again, this isn’t to discourage anyone from getting tattoos or to remove those they already have. I just wish I had spent more time on self-discovery before doing something so permanent to my body. With or without tattoos, I want to live with no regrets. On a positive note, I can still see the beauty in them. Once, I was in pain, and that pain became something beautiful. I know I’m headed toward a brighter path.