We’re living in the delulu era—or so this generation likes to call it—but here’s the thing: this mindset isn’t new. The wealthy and successful have been practicing their version of “delusion” for ages. With this Taurus full moon as my muse, I want to share how embracing a “delusional” mindset transformed my life—not just emotionally, mentally, and spiritually, but even physically.
For those of you who’ve been with me since I started this blog back in 2017, this might come as a surprise. I’ve always been a data-driven, logical, analytical person. I’ve lived by facts, numbers, and what’s “real.” But as the years unfolded, especially these last few, I began to see just how toxic that mindset had become.
These past few years were brutal. I burned out before COVID hit, and the pandemic just amplified everything. Even then, I never stopped working—I’ve always been a high-functioning person. But being surrounded by energy vampires (let’s call them what they are) and people who weren’t aligned with who I truly am only made things worse. It all added up like bad compound interest—except in this case, the investment was my energy, spent on the wrong people and things.
Even in the middle of my pain, I knew I had to figure things out. I couldn’t live like that anymore. I didn’t want to stay stuck in a life that felt so misaligned. So, I started searching. First, I turned to philosophy—reading books, exploring big ideas—and then I ventured into Bible study, church, and eventually converting to Catholicism. At that point, I wasn’t even sure what I believed in; I just knew I needed guidance. I found myself praying (to whoever was listening), asking, What now? What’s next? I thought I was content with work and material success, but deep down, I knew I wanted something more—I just didn’t know what it was.
Then, everything shifted. This year, I enrolled in fashion school, a decision that felt completely out of my comfort zone. I met people who weren’t like anyone I’d worked with before. My career has always been about numbers and logic, but these people were bursting with creativity, emotion, and generosity. At first, I felt out of place. I thought, What am I doing here? I don’t belong. But over time, I realized those thoughts came from how little I believed in myself. Being around people who matched my energy and supported me was life-changing. I don’t regret the missteps I’ve made with relationships in the past—I see them now as beautiful learning experiences.
Exploring art, philosophy, and myself—even in ways that might seem “delusional” to others—has worked for me. It taught me that what matters isn’t whether something makes sense to anyone else. What matters is that I believe in it. My old self would’ve demanded evidence or a detailed explanation for everything, but now I know that life doesn’t always need to be explained. What’s true for me might not be true for you—and that’s okay.
This shift in mindset did more than just help me grow emotionally and mentally—it helped me let go of judgment. Exploring art and creativity gave me the freedom to stop being so critical of others and just accept people for who they are. I’ve stopped focusing on what others are doing and redirected that energy into focusing on myself. It required so much humility to admit that the things I once hated about people might actually be the things I deeply wanted for myself. Accepting that truth—and having the courage to take action—was one of the hardest but most transformative steps I’ve ever taken.
This journey of self-love also made me realize how much I’d been neglecting myself physically. Learning to love and accept myself helped me see that I deserved to take better care of myself, and that care began to reflect in my overall aura in ways it never had before. Even after all the procedures I had done in the past, nothing compared to the glow that came from within when I started to truly love myself. Now, I look happier. I feel healthier. I’m no longer chasing perfection—I’m simply living authentically, and it shows.
Embracing this “delusional” mindset saved me. It taught me that I am capable of rewriting my story and living in alignment with my truest self. I hope this inspires you to take a step outside your comfort zone, trust your instincts, and maybe—even just for a moment—embrace your own delulu era. You never know where it might lead.
Maryjo Morikawa 